What a computer is and is not! (Part 1)

Hello my friends, one again I see myself writing complete and utter nothing. So let's get started with part UNO! of my little guide.

I am a IT geek, this means computers are a large part of my life. So large a part that I spend more than 10 hours a day behind them (Closer to 16 hours, but who's counting). I get a lot of requests from people to help with their computer issues, so I have a lot of stories of these "Issues". Let's start with one of the earliest computer "Issues" I got as a geek of the computer age.


1. Cup holder?

I was a System Administrator, that is a person who basically works with computers at a high level. In short we know what you installed, downloaded, watched and yes that means also those fun pictures of slightly under dressed donkeys! One of my clients called me telling me they could not read their cd-rom, the drive would not close all the way. I went to the user and found something I did not expect, mostly due to my inexperience with user stupidity.

You see this is a cd-rom.

Compact Disc, round and shiny.

And it goes into your cd-rom drive to read/write, and this is a cup for liquids to drink.

I never knew those lines meant that, the more you know!

Now a cd-rom drive has a hole in it to allow the electric motor to click in and rise up into the cd-rom so it can spin it, allowing it to read or write the data. However, some apparently see a hole and just have the need to stick things into it.

Cup....Holder...?!

A cd-rom drive can fit a cup, but it is not made for it. It is like seeing your dog yawn and think, I can fit an umbrella in there!

Also fits walking sticks, bricks, PS3 controllers, the list goes on and on.

A cd-rom drive is filled with electrical motors, one being too close the door, another to spin the disk, one to move to laser left and right and some more. These are however the most important ones to be able to use the drive. Now the thing is when a cd-rom drive (at least when you have one that opens electrically) it will close itself after some time again (Depending on brand it can stay open until you restart the system). When it closes, if your cup is not so strong or small it will fall, leak, etc all over the drive. Causing a lot of "stuff" to leak into the drive jamming it up eventually. And this is what happened, the whole drive was filled with cola, coffee and what I can only describe as a small forest of fungus. The user informed me he had been using his "cup holder" several times a day but now it had to read a cd and it just wouldn't. Now I can't slap any client on the head, but I sure wanted to. This user didn't understand me when I told him the cd-rom drive was not got cups. After several minutes of trying to explain it I gave up and replaced his "cup holder". I had to replace it several more times after till I finally left that strange place. 

2. Zombie Keyboard.

Most people might not realize, but your keyboard is several times more dirty than a public toilet! It holds deceases, fungus, bacteria, food, dust and specially fats. You might think "What you talking about fool?", well studies have shown some disturbing things. "Out of 33 keyboards swabbed, four were regarded as a potential health hazard and one harbored five times more germs than one of the office's toilet seats." Now think about that word "Health Hazard". Ever heard anybody say "Hey don't use that toilet it is a Health Hazard" or "Stay away from that hooker, she's a Health Hazard". Ok well, the last one might somewhat be true. Still we're talking about keyboards here, not hooker, unfortunately.  Now my story.

One day, while I worked at a service desk for computers, a client came by saying her keyboard no longer worked. I asked her to show me the keyboard and what I saw was just horrifying.

Alphabet herb garden!

No, it was not growing green weeds, but it was growing white fungus, keys yellow from tar and nicotine, most keys sticking because of spilled drinks, and many, many food crumbs. The keyboard was doomed, I didn't even wanted to touch it fearing I would get the Ebola virus. This keyboard surely was found in a dumpster, that was sunk into a pile of shit. I informed the client that unfortunately there was no way to safe her keyboard, I instead informed her to buy a new one. She bought a new one, after which she threw the old keyboard in the dumpster outside. Now comes the interesting thing, after work when I went to the dumpster, all the garbage was there, except the keyboard. I can only imagine that it now walking the earth, forever looking for memory to eat as a zombie keyboard. 

OCZ, OCZZZZZZZZZZZ...

Well this ends part 1 of my special guide to what computers are, and what not! I hope to write more again soon so I can maybe inform the few that actually take my advice.

Till next time!

Work, it seems to work!

Well my friends, it has been a while has it not. Well for me it sure has been a long time since I felt even the urge (or time, energy, stamina, willpower or courage) to write something in my blog again. Now you may think "Wow, he is still alive" and you would be right, I am still alive your Ninja army has failed! And failed for obvious reasons!

Give us your happy meal!

So I am still around, and while I am not sure what to write about some things did happen in the past few months. First I worked, and I worked and worked and than, yes my friends I worked some more!

While I can not go into any details I can say that my job involves a lot of people that have tiny issues that I fix all the time, also some bigger things but those do not matter. It is the small stuff that matters my friends, the tiny things. Like saying hello to a co-worker, giving a smile to a person who's working harder than you are. Maybe even just sending a cute puppy email to your boss who really has no clue who you are! Yes my friends the small things matter!

So after walking around with a big smile on my face for a while, and making people think I am drunk as a skunk from life. I actually got promoted at work, how about that. It helps to crawl through the shit also.

When your wings are covered with shit, you can only crawl!

Work is work, and it works. You get paid to pay for gas to drive to work. It all works! We just spend and buy, trying to achieve higher and better for ourselves. But at the cost of abusing the time we have to live life. I'm no philosopher, nor will I ever claim to be. But something is not right when you work, to work, to buy life to work. Not everything works out the way we want, and they say life gives what you need, but not what you want. Well maybe it than time to look at it in another way. Live life, let work what works. But never forget the small things, that make life work. 

I think I now have officially lost you, so time for a cute picture of a kitten to make your brain get back to its normal mode.

 Look into my closed eyes and get back to reality!

So yeah, what have I been doing in past few months, mostly set out the path I wish to take in life. And I'm not talking about "I want to get married, get a house, make some kids out of lego and rob a bank!". No I mean I want to further my life in some way. Study more, see different cultures and mess with them! Go out and explore new way to see the world, to see people in different views, mostly non naked.

Work the work that works, let go off the fear that nothing may work and just work on it. Ok maybe I am just rambling, maybe nothing makes sense. But in a way I feel that I need a different perspective in life. No not want you to do the same, find your own ways of thinking find your own work that works. 

A little story, some time ago I sat down with a man. Everybody was just ignoring him while he was selling peanuts, dried fruit and other delights. I sat down and listened to his story, I learned he was only selling these because it gave him time to think. You see he had made his money already, had his house paid of and his car ready to go. He had no debts, no worries in life other than sit and sell his delights and think. He told me he enjoys just sitting there thinking of new ways to better life. Think of inventions, ways to improve the old and better the new. I listened for over two hours while he sat there calmly and barely sold a thing. This man told me how he had seen the world, how things changed around him and how he found himself in life. I could only admire him. The weird thing was, in the end he did not tell me how he got where he was now. But the story got stuck in my mind and just wouldn't let go. This man sitting in an old t-shirt and shorts gave me part of his story to share with you, and I come back to him whenever I can and all I can do is listen. 

So I found out something, and that there is wisdom in many of us, all we need to do is listen. But it is important that we are able to look past the shit, and see what really matters. 

Well my friends, this made no sense I know. But I hope you did enjoy my rant!

Living life, it works to listen..